Being a stay at home mom (SAHM for those of you who are behind on the acronyms) has turned out to be pretty much exactly what I expected. It has been five months on Friday and I still don't have the hang of it. For me, as I hope for others so I'm not the only miserable failure, I can accomplish 2 of the 3: Being a good mom, being a good wife, keeping a clean house. Guess which one falls to the wayside? You bet my house is cluttered! Not messy, if you exclude the ever growing sink full of dishes because I hate doing dishes... this is why I have 12-18 bottles at all times, but cluttered.
I used to think the 1450 sq ft of our home was too big, until we brought home baby gear. Real estate agents should really tell you to plan for 1000 sq ft per child you plan to have. Drew and I now have 450 sq ft to share, the rest is allotted to baby and dogs ... when they fit.
And the other thing I expected was to be very much alone all the time... or want to be alone. The dogs spend most of their day in the yard which is fantastic because having them inside is like having an ADHD toddler, a moody teenager, and of course the enthusiastic baby and they may as well all be speaking Spanish because I can't understand a bloody thing and none of them seem to understand me.
Thank goodness for my years of hardcore training at being a hermit or the lack of communication could drive me mad. Instead I provide commentary for my 21 week old daughter, and shes hysterical.
Leaving the house is not an option usually. I'm not that coordinated. I feel like I have to plan it down to the minute the night before. I'm getting braver though. We attempted the Moby wrap twice in the past 2 days and we're making progress. Let me break it down for you.
Day 1: Tried a structured carrier and Chloe kicked her legs, cried, and scratched at me with her tiny baby claws. Switched her to the Moby. She fussed, leaned her head as far away from me as possible so to make sure that I was not to think that tying her to me would draw any sort of affection such as willful snuggling or appreciation. I am mom - transportation device, feeder, bum changer, and bather. I am not dad - snuggler and general AWESOME parent.
Day 2: Lasted 30 minutes as opposed to the day before. Sneaky mom, waiting for Chloe to be overtired after refusing to nap for 3 hours. Walked around, looked in mirrors so Chloe could flirt with herself, and then sat down. Baby, warm and snuggly, begins to fall asleep... momentarily resting her head against my chest. Mommy makes fatal mistake of kissing sweet good smelling baby hair on top of her head, baby realizes what is going on, promptly throws head backwards and cries.
I removed her from the Moby, put her in the crib, and she immediately fell asleep.
I'm sure her teenaged years will be fun.
Kudos to Chloe though! She happily sat in her high chair and read her Baby Einstein book for about 45 minutes while I prepped dinner. She did sneeze on it twice (good thing the pages are wipeable!) but I do mean read. She was reading out loud to me...in baby language, perhaps in thanks for the hundreds of books I've read for her.... or in attempt to throw off my cooking. Silly Chloe, I don't attempt recipes with more than 5 ingredients or ones that have any challenging steps!
Then dad came home and the day got a billion times better... Until we ate enchiladas in front of her and she let us know with her stern facial expressions that eating enchiladas without offering one to her was very rude and that we should be ashamed of ourselves. Still, those who have no teeth receive no enchiladas!
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